Thanksgiving 2009 - One for the Books

Some people use their blogs to make everything seem perfect while their lives are imploding. Some people use blogs to try to convince the world that they are worthy of love and respect. Some people are incredibly real - those are the ones I love to read. I try to document things as they really are - for the sake of my family history. I want my girls to look back and see the reality of their lives, not just the sugar-coated version that will look like I was the perfect mother in the perfect marriage with the perfectly clean house. That doesn't mean that every little flaw is exposed, but that the essence of the situation is caught.


I say all of this now because this post will include it all: the sickening perfection and the horror of it all. But this was a great Thanksgiving, regardless of the eventual outcome. We cooked, we laughed, we cleaned.


We approached this Thanksgiving, our first alone with just the six of us, our first in Las Vegas, our first where the four girls and I would be doing 100% of the cooking 100% from scratch, as an opportunity to establish tradition. The tradition we established? That the process is more important and fun then the outcome.


Let us begin a week and a half prior. In Family Home Evening, everyone was given the opportunity to make requests for the menu. I spent the next week fine tuning and organizing and shopping. A few days before Thanksgiving, we met again for the assignments: everyone would help. Everyone would have several jobs. All went great. The girls were excited to embark on this new journey, the turkey was on sale, the recipes were tracked down. I made a schedule for Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday that would distribute all of the work so the Thanksgiving could be relaxing.


Tuesday we began. We made sugar cookies, put together our goodie plates to deliver to new friends and teachers. We got out all the ingredients, recipes, and cooking equipment. We did all the dishes so we could cook in a clean environment.


Here was the schedule:

Appetizers: ready by 11:00
Eric's Bacon-Wrapped Scallops – McKayla (Thursday 9:00am - make marinade, marinate scallops for one hour, wrap in bacon, skewer, cook)
Kirsti's Artichoke-Cheese Dip in a Bread bowl – Madison (Wed – chop artichoke hearts, mix together dip, store in fridge, Thursday 9:00am prep bread bowl, filling with mixture, cook and toast sourdough)
Crudites with Ranch Dip – Monterey (Wed – make Ranch, cut carrots, prep celery, Thursday 9:00 am – cut cucumbers, red pepper, open olives, wash tomatoes; arrange on platter)

Dinner: eat at 3:00
Maya's Favorite Salad – Maya (Thursday 1:30 prep salad)
Truffle Butter Turkey - McKayla & Madison (Thursday 9:00 am prep and start to roast)
Sweet Potato Souffle – McKayla (Wednesday – prep, Thursday – bake at 1:00)
My Daddy's Mashed Potatoes & Gravy - McKayla & Madison (Wed night – peel potatoes, Thursday – 1:00 start potatoes; start gravy)
Stuffing-Stuffed Mushrooms - Maya & Monterey (Wed – prep filling, wash mushrooms, assemble, Thursday – bake at 2:30)
Orange Zested Cranberry Sauce – Madison (Wed – make, store in fridge)
Homemade Rolls - McKayla & Madison (Start as soon as Turkey is in the oven)

Dessert: serve at 5:00
Pumpkin Pecan Pie – Maya (Bake on Wed night)
Leaf and Turkey Sugar Cookies – All (Bake on Tues; decorate on Thurs)
Brownies – Maya (Bake on Wed)

Everything went perfectly. I mean it. We all worked together. There were no last minute runs to the grocery store. Nothing burned. The Pecan Pie set beautifully. The Cranberry Sauce could have won a throw down with Bobby Flay. No cuts. No broken dishes or fingernails. Everyone got along. I did forget to buy the ingredients for the salad, but honestly, we could live with that. We ate all the veggies on the veggie tray before dinner so I think we were in great shape veggie wise. The rolls were a dream.

We put everything on a small buffet table. At the long dinner table, we kept the rolls and butter close at hand.

We sat down to dinner. I was so proud of the girls. They really worked hard and they were proud of everything they had accomplished. I truly believe that when children cook their own food, they are more inclined to try new and different food. Everyone ate everything. It was beautiful. We were able to have relaxing dinner conversation, without having to worry about impressing anyone (that is code for some extended burping contests) everyone was positive and complimentary towards every ones cooking efforts. We had good conversations about what we liked about having Thanksgiving this way and what we missed about not having it with extended family. Everything was very positive. Dinner took a while. It was glorious and lovely.

I should have known something was about to go drastically wrong.

Maya and Monterey wanted to eat brownies. I told them to go ahead. They went over to the buffet table and there was a bit of a struggle over a particularly large, luscious looking brownie. A few words were exchanged, a little struggle and boom. The table went down. The food flew up. One side of the legs had buckled. Everything was down. The pie was completely saved. It landed right side up, away from the broken ceramic bowls. Everything else was on the floor. Mixed together.

This follows in a long line of holiday disasters. I immediately thought about A Christmas Story and the dogs eating the turkey, They ended up in a Chinese restaurant eating Peking Duck with the head still attached. Then there was Christmas Vacation where the turkey was so dry and there was cat food in the jello. There was even The Brady Bunch wedding where the boys' dog was chasing the girl's cat and the wedding cake went down.

Then there were the extended family stories: the devilled eggs made with cat pee, multiple throwing up stories, a few fights, some drunk extended family, and a few others I could mention but won't because the people involved are still alive and kicking.

All we could do was laugh.

So what do I have to be grateful for? We had already finished dinner. We did not end up in an emergency room (see the 4th of July post.) Most of the turkey was still in the kitchen. The rolls were not involved at all in the incident. There was no yelling or screaming or blaming (except that Monterey claimed that either Jesus or a ghost did it - but the deflection of blame is almost an art form for Monterey.) We all worked together to clean it up, sweep, mop, throw away without anyone being asked. We even saved a few brownies. The pie was safe. None of my beautiful Polish pottery was broken. The only broken dishes were old and not really my favorite things anyway. We probably did not need the calories from all those yummy leftovers anyway.

Something always has to go wrong. This was simply our homage to Murphy's Law. But I am so glad that THAT went wrong instead of so many other things that could have gone wrong. We will always remember this Thanksgiving. Without that incident, this would have been a blur in a couple of years. Now we can always look back and laugh and say "Remember the time when all the food went down and we had no leftovers?

Thanksgiving Options

Most years of our marriage we have gone to my husband's family for Thanksgiving dinner. This had many advantages, namely, incredible food. I mean this was always a fantastic, free-for-all, feast. The dinner would be divided up among all those who were interested in cooking. Some years, because of travelling, all I had to do or could do was just show up. Since so many of us were living locally, we did a massive division of labor. One person might handle the appetizers, another might have dessert, someone else might do all the veggies, etc. Other times we just divided dish by dish. The division of duties is a good thing: everyone could specialize in their own part and not mass produce mediocre dishes. As if that was not enough, they are all great cooks. Everything was always delicious. The only downside: too many and too much. How could a stomach possibly become so engorged and not even get a taste of everything? (By the way, that is not really a huge downside.)

This year, we are just a family of six. We met together and at Family Home Evening we discussed our options. I wanted to be sure that everyone had everything they wanted. Ryan suggested we go to Claim Jumper for our Thanksgiving dinner. He was just thinking of me: no prep, no dishes, no clean up, free refills, etc. What a thoughtful husband. If the husbands of this world planned holiday dinners, we would all go out to dinner. I thought that maybe we could cook every one's favorite parts of the meal and then get a restaurant to provide the things we really were not passionate about. I got the menu from Claim Jumper and Ryan and I perused it. Again, he just wanted to eat there. But what about our dinnertime banter? In a restaurant, we act one way, at home another. That was appealing to him as well. Somehow he doesn't appreciate that the girls will spontaneously break into song at a subtle suggestion. Someday, when they all move away, he will miss that.

As I pondered his offer and the different options, I could not stomach the idea of going out. As I looked at the sides we could order, it did not sit well either. I am a cook. I love to cook. Most of the things I make, people seem to enjoy. All around us, we see that cooking is becoming a lost art. Suddenly it hit me: this was not about ease or tradition or about endless refills of Dr. Pepper. This was about me teaching my daughters how to cook.

In a Church Welfare Training Meeting earlier in the year, this is what Julie Beck, the Relief Society General President, said:

"How do we become self-reliant? We become self reliant through obtaining sufficient knowledge, education, and literacy; by managing money and resources wisely, being spiritually strong, preparing for emergencies and eventualities; and by having physical health and social and emotional well-being. So what skills do we need to help us become self reliant? It was important for my grandmother to know how to kill and pluck a chicken. I have not yet had the necessity to kill and pluck a chicken. However, even in the early days of the Church, Brigham Young pled with the sisters to learn to prevent illness in families, establish home industries, and learn accounting and bookkeeping and other practical skills. Those principles still apply today. Education continues to be vitally important. Each of us is a teacher and a learner, and literacy, technical, and reasoning skills are a daily requirement. There is also a great need for better communication skills in marriages and families, and good parenting skills have never been more important. We also see an increase of debt and consumerism in the world.

I asked several bishops what self-reliance skills the sisters in their wards needed most, and they said budgeting. Women need to understand the implications of buying on credit and not living within a budget. The second skill bishops listed was cooking. Meals prepared and eaten at home generally cost less, are healthier, and contribute to stronger family relationships."

I made up my mind: not only will this be completely homemade, but each daughter will help me with different parts of the menu. This way, they are involved and they are learning how to cook, bake, and plan a large, detailed, multi-course meal. Since we normally partition the meal, they have never been involved with those aspects. They have never prepped a turkey since that was always done before we arrived. I have done a whole Thanksgiving dinner by myself several times. This is what I need to teach them.

So here is the menu and the division of duties:

Appetizers:
Eric's Bacon-Wrapped Scallops - McKayla
Kirsti's Artichoke-Cheese Dip in a Breadbowl - Madison
Crudite with Ranch Dip - Monterey

Dinner:
Maya's Favorite Salad - Maya
Truffle Butter Turkey - McKayla & Madison
Sweet Potato Souffle - McKayla
My Daddy's Mashed Potatoes & Gravy - McKayla & Madison
Stuffing-Stuffed Mushrooms - Maya & Monterey
Orange Zested Cranberry Sauce - Madison
Homemade Rolls - McKayla & Madison

Dessert:
Pumpkin Pecan Pie - Monterey
Leaf and Turkey Sugar Cookies - All
Brownies - Maya

Each girl will help make the shopping list for their item, plan when we should make it (including prep in advance stuff) decide on the serving dish, etc. Everyone will work in the kitchen.

Oh yeah, I forgot one thing. Ryan can take care of the beverages. Baby steps for him. Next year he is going to get something he actually has to make with his own two hands.

Thanksgiving Five Years Ago

Five years ago, we had just moved to the Palm Springs area. Our life had changed drastically. We had two under two and Ryan was taking the responsibility of being the sole-breadwinner while I was adjusting to being a stay-at-home mom for the first time. I had attended a Church Relief Society meeting where Jackie Simpson had shared and idea of kind of a time capsule concept. You would survey the family and then in five years or ten or twenty, reflect back on what people where thinking at that time. Some things change. Some things do not. You could ask questions or just give a prompt. The point is to get people sharing their thoughts and state-of-mind and ideas. I had suffered with the death of my father the year previous to this and felt that I wanted this information. I would have loved to have had this survey from my dad.

Here are the questions and the results:

What is your favorite thing to do on Thanksgiving weekend?
Ryan - golf, spend time with the family, sleep
Lisa - eat, decorate for Christmas
McKayla - watch movies with my family
Madison - I like to eat with my family
Ryan's sister Melissa - cook
Ryan's sister Kym - eat, go to movies, early AM shopping, being with family
Ryan's brother Matt - eat, go to the movies, watch the Skins game
Matt's wife Meagan - eat, sleep, have fun w/ the family
Ryan's dad Tom - eat, watch football games, play golf, kiss my granddaughters
Ryan's mom Diane - spending time with family

What are your five favorite things to eat on Thanksgiving?
Ryan - yams, rolls, potatoes, mac&cheese, dips
Lisa - Caress family rolls, my dad's mashed potatoes and gravy, yams w/ pecan praline topping, cranberry sauce, deep-fried turkey
McKayla - corn, turkey, mashed potatoes, cranberry sauce
Madison - cranberries, turkey, vegetables, fruit, mac&cheese
Melissa - mashed potatoes, yams, rolls, fried turkey, gravy
Kym - yams, deep-fried turkey, rolls, pie, pie
Matt - turkey, gravy, artichoke dip, rolls, candied yams & Henry's (root beer)
Meagan - green bean supreme, deep fried turkey, potatoes, stuffin', any of Kym & Missy's delicious creations
Tom - pumpkin pie cheesecake, turkey, wheat rolls, stuffing, Lisa's dip

What is your favorite Thanksgiving memory?
Ryan - going to Grandma's (Ruth)
Lisa - cooking for a whole ward on my mission in Taiwan. We got 2 Butterballs through the black market. The elders (4 of them) ate one whole turkey while my companion and I did the last minute shopping. The second turkey was enough for the whole ward since everyone just wanted a little taste.
McKayla - my first Thanksgiving
Madison - when I started to like mac&cheese
Melissa - eating at Grandma & Grandpa Caress' when they lived at Pine Terrace with all my relatives
Kym - same every year: cooking & lots of food & laughter around the table
Matt - Grandma Caress yelling at everybody and saying "nobody loves me" and walking out of Uncle Jack's house
Meagan - last year, helping in the kitchen w/ Kym and Melissa, my fabulous sisters
Tom - this one
Diane - whenever the whole family is together

If you could take your whole family for a "Destination Thanksgiving" where would you take us all?
Ryan - We are already here (referring to the Palm Springs area)
Lisa - New York City. We would go to the Macy's Parade, have dinner, then shop in NYC on Fri and Sat.
McKayla - NYC!
Madison - Disneyland
Melissa - Rome; for Pizza
Kym - Jackson Hole, WY
Matt - Hilton Head, SC
Meagan - the temple or a movie ... or both!
Tom - here in Bermuda Dunes
Diane - here in Bermuda Dunes

Do you have a favorite Thanksgiving song, scripture, and/or story that you would like to share?
Lisa - "Count Your Blessings" and "That's What Turkeys Have For Thanksgiving"
Madison - "The Turkey Woogie" and "That's What Turkeys Have For Thanksgiving"
Melissa - "Come Ye Thankful People"
Meagan - "Five Little Turkeys" "I'm a Nut" "I Saw a Little Turkey" and "Because I Have Been Given Much"
Tom - Alma 28, "We Thank Thee O God for a Prophet"

What are the five things you are most thankful for?
Ryan - wife, kids, golf, job, family
Lisa - my children, my husband, my whole family, the gospel, my health
McKayla - family, food, chocolate, malls
Madison - my family, friends, house, money, love
Melissa - family, gospel, home, friends, education and opportunity
Kym - my testimony, my family, my health, my talents, my hot bod j/k!:)
Matt - the gospel of Jesus Christ, my family, my freedom, my beautiful wife, health
Meagan - Matt (my most lovely, adorable & hot husband) the gospel, family, sleep, holidays with the family
Tom - Jesus Christ and His Atoning sacrifice, my wife & family, Redlands Temple, granddaughters, family history and the spirit of Elijah
Diane - the temple

Things have changed in the Caress Family: Matt and Meagan have welcomed a son and daughter, Kym is now married with a son, Tom and Diane moved houses, and we moved away. Maya and Monterey were too young to express anything but hunger, sleep, and a full diaper; let alone opinions. It is always fun to look back and think about how some things change and others stay the same.

Welcome to Las Vegas ... again

Woo! What a day.

We started out going to a Chinese restaurant for breakfast. An Elder, Duane Frizell, that I served with in the Taiwan Taipei mission happens to be in our new congregation at church and alerted us to this rare find: real Chinese breakfast. It is my favorite , but so rare to find. We decided we were dying to try it and we were dying to have the girls try it so we ventured over to the Chinatown here in the Las Vegas area.

When we walked in, the waitress explained that they were not really open for breakfast. We could see other patrons eating so we asked again. She handed us a menu in Chinese with very bad broken English translations to show us what they served. We were thrilled and told her that is what we came for. She gave us a table and we noticed we were the only non-Chinese is the whole place. That alone was very exciting because then I knew we must be in a really good place.

We tried to decipher through the bad translations, but it was easier to just read the Chinese. We found a few things we wanted and motioned that we were ready to order. We explained what we wanted and asked a few questions. It wasn't until we broke out in Chinese that she finally relaxed and started understanding what it was that we wanted.

I ordered Dou Jang 豆漿 which is a type of warm soybean milk. It is very traditional to start the day with a bowl of warm dou jang. It tastes different from soy milk you would find in the stores because it is made fresh daily and served with a very coarse sugar so you can sweeten it to your taste. I tasted and sweeten until I felt it was just right. I spooned a little into the teacups so each girl could try it. They did not care for it. It is an acquired taste, but I love it. My Chinese companions and I would drink it every morning. We would order it warm on cold days and cold on hot days. One gulp and I was back in China. I showed the girls that every single person in the place was sitting there with their bowl of dou jang.

I ordered 3 dan bings 蛋餅 which is a cross between a crepe and tortilla which a scrambled egg and green onions are cooked with it. It is sooo good. The girls loved it immediately. You can eat it with a little soy sauce to add a little saltiness to it. It is one of those dishes that I liked the moment I had it and I knew they would too. I probably ate dan bings about 75% of the time for breakfast. They would be a big hit in America, if anyone wanted to try.

I ordered Sau Bing 燒餅 which is a flaky sesame bread. I used to order it with a scrambled egg in it "sau bing jya dan." It was my favorite but you could not find it in every breakfast shop - only some. Again, the girls loved it immediately.

I ordered Mantou 饅頭 which is Steamed Bread. Instead of baking it in an oven (which doesn't really exist is their kitchens) they steam it. It has a totally different texture, and a slightly sweet taste. Ryan used to order it "mantou jya dan" - with a scrambled egg in it.

I ordered Tsung You Bing 蔥油餅 which is a Green Onion Cake. I actually have a recipe for them and I make them occasionally for my girls. They love it. The ones in the restaurant were so much better. I discovered that I am too conservative on the oil and I probably don't have the heat just right. They loved them so much that at the end of the meal, we had to order one more. It is kind of like a very flaky, thick tortilla. But the way it is assembled with green onions, salt and a dash of sesame oil makes it savory and highly flavorful. All four girls went nuts for it.

I ordered Dumplings 蒸餃 which are pork steamed dumplings. They had a little too much ginger for the girls, but my girls are dumpling girls. They preferred them boiled in the traditional way, but this was more like the street vendor style. They were good, but not something I usually ate for breakfast.

Afterwards we had a little talk with the waitress about the kinds of food we could find for lunch and dinner. We have total confidence that we have found a truly authentic place. We are very excited about this insider tip. Anyone who wants to try, let us know. You will not be disappointed. The girls thanked us all day for taking them and McKayla has decided that she wants to serve a mission to Taiwan.

From their we parked at the MGM Grand and walked through to get to M & M World. The girls have been wanting to go since they saw it the first time on our scouting trip to find a house. They loved four floors of everything that you could possibly think to do with an M & M or the motif. Of course, since M & M are their signature candy - with four M girls, it was inevitable, they wanted to purchase the whole store. We got out with a bag full of unique colors and flavors and I'm sure that several finds of the day will end up on their Christmas list. We saw the M & M 3D movie, which the little ones loved and the rest of us tolerated.

We went next door to Coke World and enjoyed two floors of fashion and flavors and furnishings. We wanted to try the 16 different soda flavors from around the world, but Ryan talked us into the 8 different float flavors. Ice cream makes everything taste better. We loved the traditional root beer and coke. The Fanta Orange and Mello Yellow were also favorites.

From there, we went to the legendary "Welcome to Las Vegas" sign for our Christmas picture. (This is a taste of it. I won't publish the one we will be using until after Christmas.) This is just a tease. We wanted to get them sent early this year, because of the move. The weather was perfect.

Home again for our Saturday chores: laundry and cleaning, more unpacking and organizing. But what a fun half day of enjoying our new home city.

Short post about something way too funny to forget ...

My father passed away about six and a half years ago. He was very, very close to McKayla and Madison. He took care of them while I taught school. He would take them on hikes, out to breakfast, to Chuck E. Cheese, and everywhere else. They loved him very much and and have very fond memories. One of the last things my father said to me was "Who is going to take care of the girls?" I was a little insulted and replied that, as their mother, I would. He seemed somewhat satisfied with the answer.

McKayla and Madison often talk about Grandpa Frank to their younger sisters. Maya and Monterey feel cheated that they did not have time with Grandpa Frank. They are right: they were cheated. But alas, such is life.

Yesterday was Ryan's dad's birthday. As Ryan dialed up, he told everyone to talk to Grandpa and wish him a happy birthday. The phone was passed to each girl. When it reached Monterey, she took the phone. Before she put it up to her ear, she asked the question: "Which Grandpa is this?" Our unanimous reply: "The one that is alive!" Her reply: "Oh, okay."

That would have been some phone call had it been the other one.

Thanksgiving

I love Thanksgiving, and not just for the food. I love the idea of a holiday that is focused on gratitude. It is not about gifts or cards or decorations, although the holiday that comes directly after is all about all that and we LOVE it. But the idea of being able to focus on what we are thankful for is a beautiful thing. Aside from the obsession with the food, it has not been overly commercialized. Sure, some people focus on just the food and even call it "Turkey Day" (which is what it is, so no bagging here) but I love calling it Thanksgiving so I can remember the gratitude part. Some people think of football or parades or the day-after-shopping: all these things are part of it and add to the fun and family and festivities. But ultimately, the core of this holiday is about pondering the things we are thankful for.

It is sometimes in the absence of something we love, that makes us aware of how much we cherish something. For example, I never think of my health when I feel fine. But when I am sick or I have a headache or a canker sore, all the sudden I am acutely aware of how important my health is. There are times when I feel stripped of something, and then I appreciate how good it is. I wish I could remember every day how important those things are to me, but the busyness of life usually does not allow for pondering.

The experience of moving has been an eye-opener for me. There are so many things and people I am grateful for, now that they are no longer around. I really appreciate so many people and circumstances now, that I took for granted before.

Our Thanksgiving will be a little different this year. Instead of spending it with Ryan's family and gorging on a most amazing feast, we will spend it as our little family of six. We will attempt to develop our own traditions instead of relying on the traditions of others. I am not sure what will be doing or how we will do it. It is a bit of a blank slate right now, but I'm sure it will evolve as it goes.

This is Halloween

Years ago, I established some rules about Halloween costumes. They were tried and true and always seemed to work. They are basic and simple and meant to avoid frustration and last minute panic.

Here they are:
1. You are not permitted to talk about next year's Halloween costumes until after this year's Halloween is over.
2. You must decide and inform your mother what it is you want to be by Oct 1st.
3. You cannot, under any circumstances change your mind.

Reasonable? I think so. Especially since I make their costumes, it takes some effort, so no changing minds!

Albeit, this Halloween was going to be different from the outset because of the move. Gone were the homemade costumes. This would be the year to explore the store-bought costumes. I figured they would probably be happy. Boy-oh-boy was I wrong. Well, at least I know they appreciate my efforts.

I started with Monterey because she was the most consistent throughout the year: she wanted to be a pumpkin. All year long, she wanted to be a pumpkin. When we got to the store, she fell madly in love with the Pumpkin Spice costume so I bought it with complete confidence.

A week later, we went to Target and Maya picked out a cheerleader costume. She was happy, I was happy. Madison had a little trouble because even though she is eleven, she already has the body of a young woman. She graduated up to the women's sizes. When you go to buy a costume for a woman in a standard costume section, it is all about the hoochy mama. We don't have Cleopatra, we have slutty Cleopatra. (Maybe that IS closer to the historical character.) A cute Dorothy costume is now Dorothy, the most popular showgirl in Oz. We sorted through hooker-witches, Princess Leia showing lots of leg, the stripper/nurse, etc. We finally settler on a flirty Eskimo. Next year, I WILL make her costume.

McKayla graduated to not really caring too much about the whole thing. She put together a cute 50's costume (but would not pose for a photo.)

The movers put the box of Halloween decorations in storage, so no decorations. The rolling pins are in storage, so no sugar cookies.

So let us begin with Friday: School Harvest Festival. Everyone wore their costume. All was good. Here is the cake I made for the cake walk.

Tuesday: Church Party. Monterey no longer wanted to be a pumpkin. ***Violation of Rule #3*** She hated her costume. Maya graciously offered her ballet attire. She accepted. Now her official costume was a ballerina.

Wednesday: Monterey got to wear her costume to her morning class. She continued as a ballerina.

Thursday: School. Maya looked great as a cheerleader. Once again Monterey was the Ballerina, but she wanted the cheerleading outfit and was mean to Maya over it and proclaimed that she wanted to be that for Halloween next year. ***Violation of Rule #1*** It got a little ugly, but we got through the day. Here she is, mad at me, refusing to look at me, standing in-between the mermaid and a fairy.

Friday: we went and sorted out the storage unit. We found our Halloween boxes and went nuts decorating the house for one (and a half) days. No rolling pins. I will buy one this week.

Saturday: Halloween. We carved our pumpkin. We got ready. But wait, someone is planning on going as Eve and we probably would have let her at this point had it not been for a little agency known as Child Protective Services. Monterey refused to put on any costume except the cheerleading costume. ***2nd Violation of Rule#3*** It was that or nothing. We pleaded with Maya. Maya consented to be the Pumpkin Spice. What a trooper. To compensate, we all gushed about how cute she looked. Monterey put on the cheerleading costume and was also quite happy. We took pictures. They went with Ryan to the local outdoor mall for some fun activities. He brought them home and went for our traditional pizza. In the meantime, Monterey decided she didn't want to be a cheerleader anymore, she wanted to be a fairy. ***3rd Violation of Rule #3*** I dug out the old, wrinkled costume from last year. Maya went back to her cheerleading costume. New pictures were taken.

Ryan and McKayla stayed home and passed out candy while I took the other three door-to-door asking for handouts, uhh I mean Trick-Or Treating. We had a good time. Good, well-lit neighborhood, generous neighbors (we got a couple full sized bars) and an all-around good time.

When we got home, I gathered all the candy for inspection and to separate the chocolate from the non-chocolate. It smells funny after a few days if it stays mixed up. It all goes into the same pot - no individual stashes. They will eat all their favorites in a couple of days and the rest will sit around until I toss it out to make space for the Christmas candy. At least that is our tradition.

Moving Out and Moving In

When I had my babies, I felt a deep love for my maternity nurses. To them, I'm sure I was just one of hundreds that they encountered while doing their job. To me, they were my heroes. I loved them each so much. While still in the hospital, I imagined sending them flowers and putting them on the Christmas card/cookie plate list. I knew we would be best friends forever.

Of course, then I went home, the medication wore off, and I became somewhat overwhelmed by all that I had to do. I forgot about all my aspirations and all the bonding I felt. But I remained grateful in my heart.

There is something about intense experiences like giving birth, witnessing a loved one dying, and moving that makes one sooo grateful for any and all acts of service, even paid acts.

My moving team. I think I felt the same way about them as the maternity nurses. They were awesome. They came in and packed and loaded without any questions. Not one of them asked me to justify why I own over two hundred cookie cutters or why I had thirty boxes of cereal or a year supply of dry food or enough water/water containers for a three week supply of water for a family of six (albeit the 15 gallons ones were emptied) or why I have a collection of over sixty pairs of jeans (for the jean quit that I will make someday) or the hundreds of books that I own (although they did comment that we had a lot of books.) Instead, they just simply packed it all up, no questions and loaded it into their truck. What an amazing transformation. What a great team.

My cleaning team. I think I felt the same way about them as my maternity nurses. They were awesome. They came in and cleaned everything. From our carpet/tile cleaner who gave us half price just 'cause he is so nice and we have been so loyal; to our ladies that came in and cleaned all day and then when we went to pay them, they would not accept our money. (I'm not going to mention their names here 'cause I don't want anyone calling them to get the same deal.) They brought me to tears. We appreciate my mother-in-law Diane for coming and patching the picture holes and helping the older girls do touch up painting. Speaking of older girls - they were awesome. Our neighborhood friend came by three or four times to haul away trash. It was truly overwhelming to see the outpouring of love and generosity that came our way.

Then there was my TLC team. From picking up my girls to play dates, they made everything a little less hard and more joyful for the little ones who could not be left underfoot as the movers worked. Our same neighborhood friends (who helped with the trash) fed us dinner Sunday night. Friends gave and attended going away parties organized by friends. Even our elementary school secretary gave me a card and a housewarming gift. We had final lunches, dinners, and sleepovers. It is good to be loved.

I was concerned about two of my daughters' teeth issues (because we were kind of in the middle of some jaw spreading) so I stopped by and the dentist brought us in to do a last minute fix. When we finished with that, he noticed the girls were due for a check up soon. I am sure I gave a look of defeat, because the next thing you know he told his scheduler to get them in the next day. All four got their cleanings, check ups and any repair work right then and there. At least three of the people at the office worked into their lunch hour for us.

Our car battery died just as we were leaving. A phone call to AAA and the problem was solved. Yes, we had to buy a new battery, but we were relieved it did not happen on the road. Looking back, the timing of it was pretty good.

We had our final walk through with our landlord who we became friends with. There were hugs and tears. We had anticipated paying our last month rent, as per our contract, to her that morning. She told us to forget about it. She would not take our money. More hugs and tears.

The movers brought our stuff in and unpacked. This is not a pretty sight. Apparently they do not unpack it the way I would and just take it out of boxes. They filled the cupboards and the counters and the floors with our stuff. Here are some pictures showing the way they left it: ***DISCLAIMER*** These pictures are for informational purposes. They cannot be used in any court of law, particularly divorce court, since this is the first time Ryan really had any idea how much stuff I have.***

So now I am organizing and sorting and filling spaces and unpacking and settling in. Give me a few weeks.

We go to the Middle school to register and I find out lunch costs $3.50. What? At our school in CA it only cost $2.25 - $450 more a year for the two girls. Are they getting a salad bar or is a restaurant catering it? No, it is actually less food than what they got before. I told the counselor that I was told that the cost of living in NV was significantly less than CA. She explained that up until a few years ago, that was the case. But now, Las Vegas is climbing as one of the most expensive places to live. GREAT. I feel a little duped. The prices in the grocery store look the same. Our car insurance is about the same as CA. Outside of Vegas it is dirt cheap, but when people lose all their money in the slots, they steal cars, so insurance is very high. Gas is a little cheaper, maybe .10 to .20 cheaper a gallon. Utilities are the same. Rent is a little higher because of demand, but housing is cheaper ... unless you want to live in a decent neighborhood, then it is only a little bit cheaper. There is no state tax, but sales tax is the same.

We already feel at home. The house has beautiful paint and we got all of our pictures hung. It is amazing how paint and pictures make things feel a little more finished. I think we will be happy in this house. It is about the same size as our last house, but has two stories and a pool. There are design flaws, mainly dealing with storage issues, but overall it is nice. We seem to be in a great area for our church. We even got cookies from a family who lives nearby with five girls - two of which are in the same elementary classes as two of our kids. Cookies are good. Everyone tells us the schools we are in are awesome, but we were at awesome schools in CA so we have not been blown away yet.

As always, it takes time to make the transitions. I am confident that we will soon find lots of things to love and we will feel at home. Everyday it is a little better.

General Conference: the Calm Before the Storm

Every time we tried to put the move on the calendar, we found conflict. We were willing to miss Conference over the move, but didn't want to. No matter how we looked at it, we were just going to have to watch it later on, thanks to the Internet OR read the talks in the Ensign. We could live with that ... but did not want to. Ryan finally suggested that we start the whole process the day after General Conference. That way we could enjoy watching and listening without the interruptions. All the sudden everything else fell in line and we discovered it solved all the problems and conflicts. Et Voila.

Our normal Conference Weekend is quite the extravaganza. We plan food, activities, in-between session shopping and organizing, etc. I spend the whole week planning the meals, shopping, baking, etc. This one was the opposite: still busy, but totally opposite.

To start with, our goal was to get rid of all our food, not bring more in. I, therefore, completely ignored the food thing. We got up and Ryan ran to McDonald's for our breakfast, which the girls considered quite a treat, so they were unfazed. As the singing by the choir commenced, Madison asked: "Where are the Conference Snacks?" I had to confess that we had none. This was not acceptable to her, so she went in and found some stuff and started whipping up chocolate chip cookies and rice krispy treats. I felt guilty so I washed and de-stemmed some grapes and cut up our last piece of fruit: a cantaloupe. Thanks to Madison's efforts we had a pretty decent offering, all things considered.

We settled down to watch Conference.

Elder Scott spoke about Acquiring Spiritual Guidance. He gave a great example of the difficulty of feeling the spirit when you feel something intensely; "The inspiring influence of the Holy Spirit can be overcome or masked by strong emotions, such as anger, hate, passion, fear, or pride. When such influences are present, it is like trying to savor the delicate flavor of a grape while eating a jalapeño pepper. Both flavors are present, but one completely overpowers the other. In like manner, strong emotions overcome the delicate promptings of the Holy Spirit."

Since we are foodies, a food analogy goes a long way. Seriously though, this is such a challenge: to discern God's will when your emotions are raging. When feeling passion or loneliness or desperation, sometimes it is hard to not just interpret your own desires as the will of God. I thought that was a great way to put it. We still feel the spirit, and are given help, but our ability to discern it is diminished because we have emotions in the mix that are contrary to the spirit. Along with praying to have the spirit, I need to pray to discern the spirit and to be worthy to have the spirit.

Elder Bednar spoke about Living the Gospel in our Homes. He shared this:

"As our sons were growing up, our family did what you have done and what you now do. We had regular family prayer, scripture study, and family home evening. Now, I am sure what I am about to describe has never occurred in your home, but it did in ours.

Sometimes Sister Bednar and I wondered if our efforts to do these spiritually essential things were worthwhile. Now and then verses of scripture were read amid outbursts such as “He’s touching me!” “Make him stop looking at me!” “Mom, he’s breathing my air!” Sincere prayers occasionally were interrupted with giggling and poking. And with active, rambunctious boys, family home evening lessons did not always produce high levels of edification. At times Sister Bednar and I were exasperated because the righteous habits we worked so hard to foster did not seem to yield immediately the spiritual results we wanted and expected.

Today if you could ask our adult sons what they remember about family prayer, scripture study, and family home evening, I believe I know how they would answer. They likely would not identify a particular prayer or a specific instance of scripture study or an especially meaningful family home evening lesson as the defining moment in their spiritual development. What they would say they remember is that as a family we were consistent."

I was encouraged by this. We are pretty good about the consistency, but lack quality at times. Sometimes we just read the scriptures, sometimes we have a discussion or answer a question, rarely do we delve into a discussion that really applies the principles into our daily lives. It does happen, but not as frequently as wanted. I think the real lesson in family scripture study is that we must do it everyday. That is the priority. I want my children to know that I placed a high importance on that. I want them to know that God hears our prayers and we find our answers in the scriptures.

President Uchtdorf spoke about the Love of God. He said: "The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is continually growing and becoming better known throughout the world. Although there will always be those who stereotype the Church and its members in a negative way, most people think of us as honest, helpful, and hardworking. Some have images of clean-cut missionaries, loving families, and friendly neighbors who don’t smoke or drink. We might also be known as a people who attend church every Sunday for three hours, in a place where everyone is a brother or a sister, where the children sing songs about streams that talk, trees that produce popcorn, and children who want to become sunbeams.

Brothers and sisters, of all the things we want to be known for, are there attributes above all others that should define us as members of His Church, even as disciples of Jesus Christ?

Because love is the great commandment, it ought to be at the center of all and everything we do in our own family, in our Church callings, and in our livelihood. Love is the healing balm that repairs rifts in personal and family relationships. It is the bond that unites families, communities, and nations. Love is the power that initiates friendship, tolerance, civility, and respect. It is the source that overcomes divisiveness and hate. Love is the fire that warms our lives with unparalleled joy and divine hope. Love should be our walk and our talk."

I want people to think of Mormons as the most loving and generous people on Earth. To bear Christ's name on our church is a responsibility on all of us to be examples of love and righteousness, but not self-righteousness. We should not be known for our abstinence to drinking coffee or as contentious commentators. We should be promoting concern for our fellowman and we should be known for acting on that concern.

In between sessions we organized, dumped trash, delivered stuff to Goodwill, and ran errands. The next session highlight for me was a talk given by Elder Oaks about understanding the relationship between God's love for us and obeying His commandments. He stated: "I have been impressed to speak about God’s love and God’s commandments. My message is that God’s universal and perfect love is shown in all the blessings of His gospel plan, including the fact that His choicest blessings are reserved for those who obey His laws. These are eternal principles that should guide parents in their love and teaching of their children.

Persons disbelieve eternal laws which they consider contrary to their concept of the effect of God’s love. Persons who take this position do not understand the nature of God’s love or the purpose of His laws and commandments. The love of God does not supersede His laws and His commandments, and the effect of God’s laws and commandments does not diminish the purpose and effect of His love. The same should be true of parental love and rules.

Some seem to value God’s love because of their hope that His love is so great and so unconditional that it will mercifully excuse them from obeying His laws. In contrast, those who understand God’s plan for His children know that God’s laws are invariable, which is another great evidence of His love for His children.

We read again and again in the Bible and in modern scriptures of God’s anger with the wicked and of His acting in His wrath against those who violate His laws. How are anger and wrath evidence of His love? Joseph Smith taught that God “institute[d] laws whereby [the spirits that He would send into the world] could have a privilege to advance like himself.” God’s love is so perfect that He lovingly requires us to obey His commandments because He knows that only through obedience to His laws can we become perfect, as He is. For this reason, God’s anger and His wrath are not a contradiction of His love but an evidence of His love. Every parent knows that you can love a child totally and completely while still being creatively angry and disappointed at that child’s self-defeating behavior."

I think we all struggle with the concept of loving the sinner without loving the sin. How do we, especially as parents, draw the line? I believe God is perfect and has perfect love for us. I love my spouse and children with all my heart, but my love is not perfect. No matter how deeply I feel love for them, my love is imperfect. For example, when I am tired or I have a headache, it is a tad more difficult to treat them as precious as I should. I might feel impatient or even anger towards them. My emotions are not always based on pure and perfect love. Discovering how to love my spouse and children is a lifelong process and will even take me into eternity to accomplish. I really like words of wisdom I heard from Janet Lee: "The end result of parenting is not the child, but the parent." As long as I keep getting better, I believe God will bless me with His spirit to teach HOW to love those who I love.

That night, instead of our traditional dinner and shopping with the girls (while Ryan was at the Priesthood Session) I went out with church friends to have a final dinner. Tons of fun and laughs and a few tears.

On to the Sunday session. I loved President Monson's talk about Service. He stated: "I am confident it is the intention of each member of the Church to serve and to help those in need. At baptism we covenanted to “bear one another’s burdens, that they may be light.” How many times has your heart been touched as you have witnessed the need of another? How often have you intended to be the one to help? And yet how often has day-to-day living interfered and you’ve left it for others to help, feeling that “oh, surely someone will take care of that need.”

We become so caught up in the busyness of our lives. Were we to step back, however, and take a good look at what we’re doing, we may find that we have immersed ourselves in the “thick of thin things.” In other words, too often we spend most of our time taking care of the things which do not really matter much at all in the grand scheme of things, neglecting those more important causes.

My brothers and sisters, we are surrounded by those in need of our attention, our encouragement, our support, our comfort, our kindness—be they family members, friends, acquaintances, or strangers. We are the Lord’s hands here upon the earth, with the mandate to serve and to lift His children. He is dependent upon each of us.

You may lament: I can barely make it through each day, doing all that I need to do. How can I provide service for others? What can I possibly do?"

It is too easy to fill up my day with busyness. I feel like so little of my day is about me. Between being a chauffeur (service for my children) volunteering and serving on the PTO board (service for the community) church callings (service for God and my fellow church members) and then all the other motherly/wifely duties (service for my spouse and children) Isn't that enough??? How about my "me" time? My "me" time is service to others not on my daily list. I actually put a space on my "things to do" list that is a service category. In my last calling, I discovered there was always someone who needed something. If I made a point to find something nice to do for someone everyday, it was more than enough to satisfy my "me" time because those were the most satisfying acts I did the whole day. I felt like I was an answer to a prayer. That was much more satisfying than a pedicure.

The last session highlight for me was Elder Holland's talk about bearing testimony of the Book of Mormon. I think many members felt the same way about his talk. My favorite part was this: "In this I stand with my own great-grandfather, who said simply enough, 'No wicked man could write such a book as this; and no good man would write it, unless it were true and he were commanded of God to do so.”

Wowza. I have never heard that before, but it is so true. His testimony was bold and clear. Reading the Book of Mormon with a pure intent means that we are willing to accept that it is true if God reveals it to us. Our INTENTION is to follow through if it turns out to be true. With this next go around, as I read, I think I will be thinking about the meaning of pure intent.

The last few days I have not felt well. I was building up too much stress dealing with everything involving the move. I sat down and started writing this and found it is a great release of stress. Sharing my feelings and getting my emotions out on my blog is my therapy. I felt immediately better.

Moving

Moving. We are moving. WE are moving. We ARE moving. We are MOVING. Maybe if I keep saying it over and over I will finally internalize it. I am totally out of touch with my emotions. I am feeling everything at once: stunned, excited, devastated, stressed, mellow, worried, curious, anxious, thrilled, scared, overwhelmed, denial, grief, acceptance.

Ryan has interviewed and accepted a position with Marriott in Las Vegas. It is a wonderful opportunity for him that puts him in line for a good series of promotions. Since we are renting, we don't have a house that is underwater. Therefore, we must seize this opportunity.

It is hard to think of saying goodbye. We have friends in our church, neighborhood, school, soccer and the community as a whole. We have family here. We have been involved in many sports and PTO and activities. I cannot go into any local store without running into friends. It is actually pretty neat. I know where to go to buy everything. I know where to get the best carne asada meat and tortillas. We found the best place for awesome fish. We are friends with the editor of the local paper. I finally found a good tres leche cake (probably the toughest thing to do in a new area.) I know where every book in the library is - I could work there in a heartbeat. I know who to call if my car breaks down. I know who will do anything for me at the drop of a hat. I know who I can tell all my secrets to. I have a great plumber. I have a great handyman. We have play date partners. I have the best chiropractor. My daughters go to the best schools and have the best teachers in the world. We have all the best connections at Ruth Chris, Morton's, Roy's, Castelli's, Sullivans, and Pacifica. We have friends who are moms for our girls when they need an extra one. We have friends who are dads for our girls when they need an extra one. Ryan has great connections for great golf. I am on a first name basis with the check out ladies at Stater Bros and Trader Joe's, the librarian, and everyone at our elementary school. We love our bishop. We are close to Costco and exclusively buy our gas there. We have seen professional tennis, golf, and basketball. We have the best piano teacher. We love our church family as if they were really our own family. We have had meals brought in when we needed them. We have the best photographer. When we go to the doctor, she talks to me like we are friends and partners in taking care of OUR children. We have friends who pick up packages for us when we are out of town. When I go to the dentist, ALL the ladies (and the dentist as well) talk and talk and talk. We almost hope that they have cavities so I have an excuse to go back and visit with them all. I love Miss Kim at the beauty school. Our air condition repair guy is a saint. We have friends that teach us tolerance and love and patience and endurance.

Am I done yet? Not even close. That was just off the top of my head and before I really even started thinking about it.

Are there things that we will not miss? You bet. But, I will try to stay positive. (Mainly because we are moving from one blistering hot desert to another so why should I dwell on the inferno that is the bane of my existence?)

I'm sure that we will find many of these things in Las Vegas and we will grow to love it there as well. But for now, let me shed a little tear over those we love and those who have loved us in return. (I think I just borrowed that from Moulin Rouge playing in the background as I type.)

McKayla's Humanitarian Project

McKayla is working on one of her Young Women's Value Projects.

"GOOD WORKS: I will help others and build the kingdom through righteous service.

Serve others. Volunteer in the community, gather items to meet humanitarian needs, spend extended time assisting with child or elderly care, or tutor in school or in your community."

She headed up a project that would gather supplies and disperse them to children who needed them through our church's Worldwide Humanitarian Project.

First, she made this poster showing samples of the materials that needed to be included in each school kit. That included pencils, eraser, a set of colored pencils, ruler, pencil sharpener, scissors, and spiral notebooks. Her goal was to gather enough to make 30. She ended up with enough to make almost 50.

She had to go around to different groups and ask for supplies. People were so generous. With the extra supplies, we donated them to a young man who is gathering school supplies for an Eagle Scout project to benefit a local charity.

She brought all the materials together and got them ready. She showed how to assemble and then had the group put them together in an assembly line method. Here are some pictures from the event.

She did a great job. Those school kits will help students in another part of this world have the resources to learn.

I am so proud of the work she did. I am glad that we belong to a church that believes in charity and service and leadership training and education and values and action.

At first, I was a little worried that this would be a difficult project because of the economy. Many people are dealing with either job losses or reduced hours. Many people are living on less and watching and counting every penny. This is a project that required things to be purchased. I knew that we would have plenty of people willing to help sew the bags. But the materials? They costs money. Actual dollars that people would have to spend.

The result was overwhelming. Everyone gave what they had. Some gave fabric. Some gave their time. Some bought things on sale. Some people donated cash. It was a wonderful thing to see everyone donate what they had. I know that blessings will abound. I know that we gave the gift of education to nameless strangers. But we also received the gift of peace and unity. Blessings will abound among each and every person that contributed.

Matthew 25: 35- 40

35 For I was an hungred, and ye gave me meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me drink: I was a stranger, and ye took me in:

36 Naked, and ye clothed me: I was sick, and ye visited me: I was in prison, and ye came unto me.

37 Then shall the righteous answer him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee an hungred, and fed thee? or thirsty, and gave thee drink?

38 When saw we thee a stranger, and took thee in? or naked, and clothed thee?

39 Or when saw we thee sick, or in prison, and came unto thee?

40 And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me.

Monterey Turned Five

Monterey turned five - that is the whole hand. What a grand adventure it has been. She is a wonderful child, but definitely has her own way of doing things.

For her birthday dinner she wanted Kraft Mac & Cheese and Uncrustables. I took over the menu: Tri-Tip, roasted potatoes, asparagus, zucchini, rolls, peaches, mango, cantaloupe, grapes, and salad. She enjoys cake so, unlike her sisters, we got to indulge. She loves fruit-flavored cakes and one of her favorite flavors is pina-colada. I decided to incorporate both the pineapple upside-down cake and a layer cake together. The frosting was coconut-pineapple. Here is Monterey in the dress-up clothes that Grandma Diane gave her for her birthday.

All About Monterey

What is Monterey’s favorite movie? Mamma Mia

Who is Monterey’s favorite princess? Ariel

What does Monterey like best about school? recess

Do you like Monterey’s hair short or long? short

Where does Monterey want to go on vacation next year? Monterey

What is Monterey’s favorite restaurant? Souplantation

What ride will Monterey go on first tomorrow at Disneyland? The Nemo Submarines

What is Monterey’s favorite primary song? I Am a Child of God

Where does Monterey like to sleep? with Mom and Dad

What do you like best about Monterey?

Grandpa Tom: her smile. Meagan: fun personality, spunky, great amount of energy. Maya: she is my sister and she is so cute and I love her. Mom: her sense of humor, determination, self-confidence, and she loves to be my baby. Madison: attitude and sassiness. McKayla: her outgoingness, her sassiness, pretty, always tells me the truth. Matt: bluntness, toughness, independent, talks to anyone. Grandma Diane: her husky voice, her being a twin with Maya, being happy and enthusiastic about everything. Dad: she is my baby.

The Disneyland trip ... I expected it to be very similar to Maya's. Since they are only a year apart. I could not have been more wrong. One advantage of taking each girl on their own is that I get to really get to know them. So many times I know their personalities in relation to how they interact with each other. Because of Maya and Monterey's closeness in age, they are very close to behaving like twins. They have very distinct personalities, mind you, but, the differences really shown through when I had them each alone.

Both Madison and Maya ate McDonald's breakfast on the way so she made sure she got hers as well. She took a little nap on the way. When we got there and went to get her ticket, she told me she did not want to wear her button. I told her she had to. You cannot give this child options if you want her to listen.

Monterey wanted to go on the Nemo Submarines first. As we went by Buzz, we could see the line was non-existent so we hoped on that first. She loved it. Surprisingly, her score was not too shabby.

Next was the submarines. She was concerned that she would get wet. I assured her that she would not. When we got in she was excited. The ride started and she bought into the whole diving concept. She was momentarily convinced that it was all real. Then the Nemo part started. "Mom, this is just a movie." She was disappointed, but still enjoyed it.

Next we headed to the Autopia. I told her that she would be driving and I would control the gas pedal.

Monterey: What are you talking about? I'm just a kid. Do you want to die?

Mom: No. Look, other little kids are doing it. You can do it.

Monterey: No I can't. There is no way I'm gonna drive a car.

The Disney employee handed us our driver's license.

Mom: See, they know you can do it or they wouldn't have given you a license.

Monterey: Mom (long pause) I don't like this. I am not gonna do it.

Mom: Look at all those kids. If they can do it, so can you.

She watched intently while we moved in the line.

Monterey: Okay, but mom, if I start going off a cliff, you have to grab the wheel.

Mom: You got it.

She was so intent. She paid attentive to every little curve and was so happy when we got off the ride without any accidents.

We went on Star Tours next. As we walked through the ride, Monterey was excited to really see R2D2 and C3PO. She asked me if we were really going to travel in space. I told her yes. She was awesome. She believed it all and was in sheer glee as we went into light speed and then crashed through the ice comet and then destroyed the Death Star and the bad guys. As we got off, she was jumping up and down. "You are the bestest mommy and Disneyland is the bestest ever. I can't believe we flew through space and we destroyed the bad guys and I just can't believe I went in space. Disneyland is so awesome 'cause you can fly in space. I can't believe I just did that." Everyone around us thought she was so dang cute. She was.

Our next ride was Small World. She loved it. We ran into the Johassons who happened to get on the same boat as us. Such a Small World. Sorry I couldn't resist the pun.

After that, we had moments of schizophrenia: "I want to wait in line to meet the princesses." It was an hour wait. After 10 minutes "I want to go to Toontown." We head toward Toontown. Almost there, "I want to go back to Buzz." Okay. Never mind this "whatever you want day." I had to take over.

Mom: Do you want the Teacups?
Here we go. She had tons of fun with giggles.
Monterey: Mom, why we sit in the tea cup?
Mom: 'Cause it's fun.
Monterey: Why do we spin?
Mom: It's like being the spoon in the teacup when someone stirs it.
Monterey: Okay.

Mom: Do you want Dumbo?
Monterey: No
Mom: Do you want the Carousel?
Let's go. She loved it.

Mom: How about Pinocchio right over here?
As soon as we get off the ride ...
Monterey: You know mom, that wasn't the real Pinocchio. It wasn't even real.
Mom: You are right, but it was fun, right?
Monterey: Whatever.

Mom: Do you want to go on Snow White?
Monterey: Yes!
Snotty Teenage girl in line: This ride is too scary for her.
Mom: Have you ever seen this girl kill a cricket? I think she can handle it.
As soon as we get off the ride ...
Monterey: That was not even real.
Mom: I know, but did you like it?
Monterey: It would have been better if it was real.
Mom: You are probably right. Can we eat? I'm getting hungry.
Monterey: I want another ride.
Mom: How about Pirates?

We head over to Pirates. Once on the boat ...
Monterey: Why is this going so slow?
Mom: It will speed up in a minute.
She loved going down. Once we get off ...
Monterey: Mom, those pirates weren't real.
Mom: I know. But it was still fun right?
Monterey: I just wish there was more real stuff.

We finally ate lunch. We ate at one of the French Quarter restaurants with live music. She loved the live music and wanted to stay longer. She danced and grooved while she ate. They sang Happy Birthday to her. She commented that the musicains were really good. We had to stay and listen until the musicains went on a break. What can I say? The girl loves New Orleans jazz music.

Next we headed to the Pooh Bear ride. She enjoyed it, but can you guess the conversation we had afterward? That's right, Pooh Bear was not real on that ride either.

Well, I was sick of the pretense of it all. Honey-child, you want real? You are going to get it. We headed straight for the Canoes. She got outfitted in a lifejacket, equipped with an oar, and climbed aboard the Pocahontes Express (I added the name so it would feel more princessy.) We rowed and rowed. It was fun and she worked the whole time, taking it very seriously. She did not like the girl in front of her who was having trouble rowing without splashing her. But hey, we were keeping it real.

Next stop, The Haunted Mansion. She asked if there were really ghosts in there and I told her yes. At first, the darkness and atmosphere were kind of freaking her out. About halfway through, she figured out it wasn't real. She did like the hitchhiking ghost even if it wasn't real.

She wanted to go on Pirates again. While we were waiting, we were talking.
Mom: Are you having fun?
Monterey: That is the stupidest question I ever heard. This is Disneyland, Duh! Of course I'm having a good time.
Mom: You don't have to insult me just because I am concerned about your happiness. You could just give me a simple answer.
Monterey: (while pausing and staring me down) Then don't ask stupid questions.

We enjoyed the Tikiroom. She believed the birds were real.

She was dying to go on Peter Pan. By the way, in case you were in suspense, she explained how it wasn't real.

We went to meet the Fairies. Monterey was excited to meet the Light Fairy and Tinkerbell. They had a nice little visit and discussed her birthday and how much they were alike. You know: sassy and occassionally naughty but always super sweet and fun.

Afterwards we went to the Fairy Souvenier Kiosk where Monterey picked out a baby version of Tinkerbell and a wreath for her hair. As soon as I paid for it, I asked her what she wanted to do next. Her response? Go home. So basically, we would have left a few hours earlier if we had got the stuff sooner.

On our way down Main Street, the Disneyland Band was parading right behind us. Monterey wanted to listen and watch. They surrounded the flag pole and played patriotic music. One thing they did, which I have never seen before, was they played the songs from all the branches of the military and invited members of the audience to come up as their song was played. So first they played the Army song and three men came out of the audience and took their place around the flag pole. They continued with the Marines, the Navy, the Coast Guard, and then the Air Force. Each time someone came out and took their place. It was really cool and of course, true to form, I got all teary.

Monterey fell asleep before we got on the freeway.

So what did I learn? Monterey is totally into reality-based entertainment. She is brutally honest. She is sassy. She loves live music. Monterey is her own person. She makes me laugh. She can be frustrating, but always comes back with something semi-reasonable. She is stuck in a five-year-old's body with the spirit of a fifteen-year old's mouth. She is a joy. She really does have an amazing imagination. She is always playing and making up stories and songs.

First Day of School

Anticipation and Anxiety. So excited that you can't sleep the night before, even though you desperately want to because you know you have to wake up before the sun for the first time in months. Will I like my teacher(s)? Will I have any friends in my class(es)? Will I remember anything I learned from last year? Will school be too hard? Will I get a lot of homework? What is everyone else wearing? What should I wear?

The first day of school is such a ritual, a rite of passage; particularly at a new school.

McKayla went to eighth grade this year: same school. She is now a Middle School PRO. She has most of the teachers that she wanted, but none of her posse in her classes. In fact, she is on a different lunch than most of them. This will present some challenges, but overall I think she will have a lot of success this year.

Madison started Middle School as a sixth grader. Wowza. She has been ready for a couple of years now. She adores all her teachers (at least after the first day) and has at least two good friends in every class. She loved all the switching and schedules and more options at lunch and proclaimed that the day had gone so fast.

I had to take the two of them to school at 6:30 am to get their schedules. I had to run back home to get the little girls ready since Ryan had to leave at 7:00 am for an early morning work meeting. Who calls an early morning work meeting on the first day of school? Is there that much disconnect between work and families???? Luckily, Ryan got the girls bathed and dressed while I did the Middle School thang with the older girls. When I got home I just had to do the breakfast and pack lunch thang.

Maya started 1st Grade today. It was a long day. She has a lovely teacher: Mrs. Levine. Not only is she physically beautiful, but she is from New Zealand which means that we love to just listen to her all day long. Maya was pleased to find several friends in her class and found her desk with her name on it. We filled out some papers and then Maya hit the yard. This was her first time playing on the big yard with all the other kids and she worked her way through all the activities. She played tetherball, went on the swings, played handball, climbed on the playground equipment. She laughed and played with other kids, even if they were older. She LOVED the big yard. By the end of the day, she was both exhausted and happy.

Monterey started Kinder today. The first day was a day that one parent had to go with the child for activities. It is fun to see her grow up. When Mrs. Grace rang the bell, Monterey ran right for the beginning of the line. She listened very well and hung on every word. Mrs. Grace explained that they should come in one at a time and get their name tag and then sit on the rug. Monterey was very good about following directions.

Mrs. Grace then explained to the parents and the students what the activities would include. Not to brag or anything, but since I did this exact thing last year, I was a pro. We had to take a picture by the calendar. I had Monterey take one with Mrs. Grace. We had to use a stamp to make the child's hand prints and then write: "With my hands I can _______." Monterey said "make hand stamps."

Monterey had to build her family with unifix cubes. Can you guess what color represented sisters? Red was for dads and blue was for moms and green was for brothers and brown for pets. Monterey got to find her name on a white cube.

She had to find the bathrooms and figure out which one was for the girls and then take a little tour to make sure they could get in and out by themselves. She opened the door and was appalled! "That is a potty for babies and I AM NOT a baby!" She continued her tirade about how she is determined to never demean herself by using something so insulting.

We then had to weigh her (41 lbs) and measure her height (42 inches.) Monterey: "What is this? The doctor's office?" and "Are we done yet?"

She also had to write her name.
M - N - O - T - E
"Mom, I'm tired. Can you finish?"
My reply: "No, finish your name."
R - E - Y
Mom: "Can you write your last name?"
Monterey: "No."
Mom: "Can you try?"
C
Monterey: "There, are you happy?"
Mom: "No, finish it."
Monterey: "Mom ..." then came the eye roll as she walked away.

A tour of the computers and a visit to the library.

The students returned to the rug. Mrs. Grace read the book "The Kissing Hand." All the students got little heart hand stamps and a baggy of hugs. This made Monterey very happy. Chocolate has that affect on her.

I love this girl, but I think I better set up an auto-ship of a pound of See's Candy to her teacher once a week.

For lunch, I took her out to wherever she wanted. She chose Panera. She enjoyed our time together. She enjoyed her cheese bagel with whipped cream (she DOES mean cream cheese) and chocolate milk, while I enjoyed my broccoli cheese soup and BBQ chicken salad. (Thanks Nancy, for taking our picture.)

We rested, ate dinner, did a Family Home Evening, and went for a swim then went straight to bed. Everyone was tired and happy to head for bed. One day down, 179 to go.

Vacay 2009: Newport

Earlier in the year, Ryan won the Manager of the Year award at his site. Along with a nice little plaque and the admiration of family, friends, and coworkers; he won a week stay anywhere we wanted. I wanted Hawaii. Our finances dictated that six airline tickets would mean that we would be eating Top Ramen for breakfast, lunch, and dinner for the next six months. I tried and tried and cried and cried and pleaded. Nope. Ryan is obviously the more financially cautious in this relationship.

So where could we go that is totally cool AND drivable? Hel----lo, Newport.

We made all our plans including activities and menus. The Marriott Vacation Clubs have kitchens so we were committed to eating in for breakfast and lunch each day. We contacted friends and family and put together a loose schedule. Ryan's brother Matt and his family decided it would be fun to come out for a couple days to join us.

We arrived on Friday afternoon with a car loaded with food, luggage and fun. We stopped at Costco and literally piled our purchases on top of laps and all around us. Ryan was the only one immune to this, because he was driving.

We had a perfect place for our group. The little kids' park was right outside our door, the MAZE (which is the fun activity center) was one building away, the pool was just past that and up the stairs. On the other side, just up some stairs was the sports' park and fire pit. Since this was our first time spending the whole week there, it was nice to be at a place so centrally located so we could take advantage of all the great facilities and programs and activities.

We got all settled in, went for a swim, and checked out everything. We started to make dinner (tacos & quesadillas) and it was ready just as Matt & Meagan & Stirling & Gwenyth pulled in. We helped get them settled. Then it got fun playing with the cousins. Off to bed and get ready for the next day.

The next day we started with a little breakfast and then we were off to the beach. We ventured to Crystal Cove which is a little secluded little section of beach. It is usually not too crowded and has good beach access and a little tide pool action. We rented some sand toys, a chair, and headed out. The water was warm enough (we ARE talking about Southern Cali beaches) and the girls got in a little body surfing. Maya and Monterey built sandcastles, which Sterling had fun knocking down. It was Sterling's first time to the beach (at least really going in the waves) and he loved it. Maya still has not been converted to how fun sand and surf is ... she hates it. We forced her out thinking that if she experienced it, she would love it. She freaked out at the seaweed as it gathered around her ankles. Ryan and I told her she had to stay out with us until she loved it. She immediately proclaimed that she loved it. The little liar. Smart, but nonetheless, a liar. Life is difficult when everyone loves the beach and you have one in the family who just hates it. Oh well, there are worse trials in life.

After the beach, we went back for sandwiches and then met up with Ryan's Uncle Jack and his two sons Jake and Luke. We had lots of fun in the pool. Afterwards Jack took us all to a great little Mexican restaurant - El Ranchito. They are all over the OC, but each one is run by a different member of the family. This one had incredible guacamole. I like to eat guacamole that is for avocado lovers. (Sometimes there are so many other ingredients and flavors that the avocado is simply the binding agent. Avocado is such a subtle flavor that you really need to be careful how much of the other stuff you add. I am a purist and do not even add lime or lemon juice to mine. It saves the color, but destroys the flavor.) This was really awesome guacamole.

The next day was Sunday and after a dinner of Tri-Tip (have you tried Costco's? It is to die for) and PGA Tournament watching, Matt and his group left and our stuff exploded all over the entire suite.

We did a lot of the MAZE Activities. Here is a list:
Sunset Serenades - we loved the live music poolside.
Princess Tea Party
Poolside Tie-Dye
Natural Bracelet
Iron Chef competition - the secret ingredient was chipotle chilies. We won best tasting, but it wasn't pretty enough. Our entry was Chipotle Chilaquiles.
Snow Cones
The Amazing Race - we finished third. (And no, there were not three participants.)
Lanyards
Jellybean Taste-Off

The MAZE crew gave us the name of "The Fun Family" whenever they saw us.

More beach action.

Lots of Pool action.

Some nice naps with the sliding doors open and cool ocean breezes blowing and waves crashing in the background.

A few secret poolside smoothies (Ryan will only find out if he actually reads this. It is a test. They were hidden deep in the overall bill. Sorry babe.)

A couple of nights on the town.

Shopping. We got a lot of the school stuff checked off thanks to Nordstrom Rack.

A Dodger Game (that was for me. It was a blast. The girls are totally re-converted to the Dodgers and Dodger Stadium. I am so relieved. And Dodger Dogs ARE so much better than the other parks.)

The Beachcomber for breakfast - a Newport tradition; with friends Anthony and Kim and buddies and babies.

Temperatures between 70 and 78 degrees the entire time: morning, noon, and night.

Three visits to Sprinkles.

Relaxation.

I finally finished "The Count of Monte Cristo."

Cabazon on the way home. We checked off several more school shopping items. Ryan was just loving waiting for us as we purchased our feminine unmentionables.

The house was a toasty 96 degrees.

Welcome home baby.

Vacay 2009: Monterey

From San Francisco, we headed south to Monterey.

Ryan and I disagree on many things: I like Thai food, he hates it. I like NYC thin crust, he likes Chicago thick. He likes mustard on hamburgers, I don't (that one has a story attached to it that I will share another time.) He likes hot, hot, hot and hates the cold. I love soup weather, Santa Barbara, Hawaii: 72 degrees all the time and I can tolerate the cold much better than heat. He loves a good spa, I love a good opera. One thing we absolutely agree on: Monterey. On our two separate lists of where we would want to live: Monterey is number one for both of us. (We do agree on many other things - important things - other than that, by the way.)

We got engaged in Monterey, vacation in Monterey, celebrated our anniversary last year, and even named our youngest daughter after our beloved little city. We have our dream house picked out. We love the scenery and the weather. It has beach and mountains and trees - gorgeous trees. It has water and golf and green. It has seventeen-mile drive - one of the most scenic drives in America. It has great communities all around - rich in history, culture, entertainment. Anyway, the point I am trying to make, and probably overstated by now, is that we love it. Last year when we were here for our anniversary, we decided we had to bring the girls back for our vacation this year.

We spent lots of time at the aquarium - two days.

They took out the jelly fish exhibit (so sad, I loved it) but they have a knew seahorse one (so happy, I loved it.) I always thought that seahorses were really tiny, like under an inch. Turns out that there are super tiny ones and larger ones, some that we saw were maybe five or six inches tall. They still are not as big as I wanted: I always wanted to ride one like Aquaman did. We learned a lot about them. We spent most of our first day with the seahorses. I loved watching their fins propel them around the water similar to a hummingbird. I loved seeing how their tails would wrap around the plant life to stabilize their body so they could eat. I love how the female deposits the eggs in the male and he is pregnant and gets to deliver the babies. Of course producing eggs is a full time job for the female and her eggs account for one-third of her body weight before she either releases her eggs into the male or dumps them on the sea floor (kind of like a period?) anyway, I don't think having your weight go from, like, 100 lbs to 150 lbs every month before your period would be fun either. Talk about your "fat clothes." Enough of the science lesson.

Everyone loved the aquarium. They do such a good job with all their exhibits and have so much for young children. The little ones always had something to do or make or climb on or slide down or touch. Maya got a beautiful stuffed-animal seahorse, pink, of course. Monterey picked a cute sea otter with a matching purse ( she named it Bella, after Bella Valdez, not Twilight.) McKayla and Madison both got shirts. Yes, the gift shop was one of our favorite parts.

We went to Seventeen-Mile Drive. This is truly a sacred place .... for Ryan. It is home to some of the best golf in the world. It is sacred to me too: the scenery and greenery are some of God's most beautiful creations. We visit Pebble Beach and every time we are in awe of such beauty.

We drove through all the beautiful sights and homes and beachfront and trees.

We went to Spanish Bay to enjoy a little peaceful evening. We all sat around the fire pits and had some beverages. Maya and I had hot chocolates. We ordered some appetizers from Roy's: calamari, lobster potstickers, and ahi sushi rolls. As we enjoyed our treats and beverages we listened to the soft rolling waves, the crackling of the fire and silence. Soon, just over the hills, we heard the bagpiper. He is the symbol of Spanish Bay. He walks up from the beach to the clubhouse every evening just before sunset. By the time he gets to us, it is quite thrilling. It is seriously one of the most relaxing and neatest thing to do. Ryan and I had done it before, but we wanted to share it with our girls.

The whole time we were in Monterey, our Monterey walked around like she was the queen of the city. And, of course, we did not try to convince her it wasn't true. Every time she saw her name she got all excited. Even in Jamba Juice, she felt like everyone was there just to honor her. We had to buy lots of things with her name: jackets, key chains, mugs ... you know, the standard touristy stuff. But for us it was a little different. We were not just buying stuff to help us remember the beautiful city, but to stock up on stuff that Monterey usually cannot find with her name on it.

We went to Carmel-by-the-Sea. This is one of my favorite beaches, definitely in my top five (hmmm ... Waimea in Oahu, Kenting in Taiwan, that beach by the Atlantis resort in the Bahamas) yes, definitely in my top five. I love the sand: pure white powder. No rocks or shells pieces. I love the cypress trees. The rough waves. The wind. The views. I love it.

We left Monterey and drove to Solvang. We ate pea soup at Andersons'. We had aebleskivers for breakfast. We purchased our pastries from our favorite bakery. We swam. The older girls and I went to see Harry Potter 6.

From there we drove home. But not until we stopped for lunch at the State Historic Landmark: Bob's Big Boy. There are other Bob's around. This one is the original and is always packed with the die-hard fans. People who eat here grew up on Bob's and love it. Because of its location in Toluca Lake, it attracts many people in the industry. It is rare that you go for lunch during the week and do not see someone famous. We came, we saw, we feasted.

We returned to hundred and teens (that is 110-119 degrees for people who are not used to it.) It is such a treat for us to get to wear sweatshirts in July. Ryan had turned off the air conditioning and all my chocolate chips were destroyed. Someday ... someday ... Monterey.